an explanation

time of your life, my immortal, etc

Time Of Your Life was a Naruto trollfic which I wrote in 2011-12. At the time, I was between 12 and 14 years old (don't remember the exact timing, since my birthday's in the middle of the year).
The entire text has been archived on Google Docs, which can be accessed by clicking Text or here, and the reviews have been archived under Reviews. I'll host backup versions of this explanation, the text, and reviews on a Tumblr, and a Neocities, as well, however, both of those will take longer to get running than this Carrd.
I have also reposted the fic under the original account, direct link here. No idea if ff.net will nuke it or not, so don't cross your fingers.
The ff.net account associated with this is xXxbloodyristsxXx. The fic was nuked sometime between 2012-13, much to the dismay of several people who were following it.
I lost access to the Tumblr, but the archive can be found here.
Below are screenshots of the account, which I recently got into, as proof.
I'll also be doing something with this account eventually...

I am NOT the author of My Immortal itself. Hats off to whoever created this glorious piece of modern culture.
Text is under text, reviews are archived under reviews.

What most people will want to know, more than anything else, is: Is this funny? (Why else would you read a trollfic?)
The answer is... sort of?
Look, I was twelve. It was the mid-2000s. There's a lot of "lolrandom" sensibilities and dumbass shock humor. The fatphobia jokes are especially cringey in retrospect. The self-harm is all lifted directly from My Immortal, so at least it's not any original kind of bad.
I think there's some gold in there, though. During the later chapters, I stopped directly lifting from My Immortal, and started introducing my own weird-ass plotlines. And I've gotta say, the imagine of Alabaster with, like, cat ears and a single wing coming out of her back, furiously singing Bring Me To Life at a horde of approaching ninja, is pretty funny to me.
It got nuked at the very climax of silliness, and honestly, I'm satisfied with that. I don't think I could finish this mess if I tried.

The second thing you might want to know, is why the hell did I choose to imitate Tara Gilesbie, to the point of trying to convince the Internet I was her?
I was twelve and bored.
And... well... it kind of worked. A lot of early commentors called me out on not being her, but as time went on, people bought into it more and more.
I want to set the record straight, now that there's a renewed interest in My Immortal and its authorship. I am not Tara. I have no connection to the original author. I'm surprised that so many people were convinced I was, frankly. There was a TV Tropes page for this fic, and it showed up on multiple wikis and Tumblr tags. There were a few sporks that treated Tara and I as one and the same. We got dozens of Tumblr anons a day. I thought it was pretty obvious that I was just another author within the extended Tara universe, but I guess not.

Flutter was someone I threw in because, honestly, Tara was getting kind of hard to write all the time. I wanted people to recognize me for who I was--which was mostly pretentious and stupidly precocious for a twelve-year-old.
I have Dissociative Identity Disorder (well, my actual situation is much more medically complicated than that, but we'll call it that for the sake of brevity and not revealing too much private medical information online) and, in retrospect, Flutter eventually became an alter. She's not around anymore, but she was very real at the time. By the time the fic got nuked, we half-believed a lot of the shit we were saying on Tumblr.
If you weren't there for that entire saga, the story went something like this: Flutter was "Raven" of the infamous feud. The two knew each other IRL. After their millionth falling-out, Flutter hacked Tara's accounts, and started managing her Tumblr for her, posting snarky things about her writing and general personality. She posted a "hacked" chapter on the fic itself, explaining how Alabaster became Ebony. Tara went on a trip to Japan during/after Christmas break, to explain my dwindling absence from the accounts. When ff.net eventually nuked the fic, I didn't have a backup copy available (I purposefully wrote the fic directly in the ff.net submit box, to make sure I had as little continuity as possible). Flutter asked our Tumblr followers if they had anything saved, but nothing came of it, and eventually it all faded into obscurity.
Obviously, neither I nor any other alters at the time actually believed we were separate people, but by the time the fic got nuked, I'd half-convinced myself I had written My Immortal.
For that reason, I'm glad that it got nuked. I can only imagine how insufferable I'd have become if this was allowed to continue.

That's pretty much it. Read it if you want. I highly recommend looking at the reviews if you can stomach death threats/rape threats and homophobia; there's some really funny shit there.

If for any reason you wanna contact me, you can at [email protected]

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